LAYOUT: week 35 ... august 24 - 30

i have to admit, posting about the past month has been really draining. recalling everything that happened is painful but writing it helped me somehow alleviate the pain. and i know also that this is one way i can preserve the memories of my dad.
i apologize if after my blog about the burial, i didn’t give any more details about the days that followed. nonetheless i hope you get to appreciate my layouts. september will be a fresh start for me...

so here are my layouts for week 35:

LAYOUT: week 34 ... august 17-23

back in paris...


thanks for looking!!

LAYOUT: week 33 ... august 10-16

last days of our stay in the philippines....


thanks for looking..

LAYOUT: week 32... august 3-9

i hope you enjoy reading the week's events from my layout...


thanks for looking!!

WEEK 31: 2 august...

here is the second part of my layout for the week:

2 august: another day for us...
it wasn't a gloomy day for us. but it sure was very different without dad.
somehow...posting the past weeks really drained my energy. so let me keep this short.

WEEK 31: 1 august 1... final goodbye

my mom had been really strong about my dad's passing, but that day it was hard to see her broke down. it was difficult enough for me to say goodbye to my father, how much more it is for my mom who was with him for almost 47 years?!! i couldn't imagine the pain.

we walked my dad from the house to the church. the rain was pouring really had that day...

we celebrated our last mass with dad....

then all family and friends bid our final goodbyes. the pain was just unbearable.. it seemed as though our tears weren't enough to express it. as our teared poured, we held each other tight. we knew we had to say goodbye and we understood that dad is now in a better...but we never really imagined that it could hurt so bad.

....goodbye, dad. we love you.

then we walked my dad from the church to his final resting place.

WEEK 31: 30 july 2009 - In memory of my dad...

30 july: we decided to make a slideshow presentation about dad. just a collection of his photos. we didn't get a big collection of photos to choose from because we were in a hurry to make the presentation. the slideshow you will see here is not the same we we used during the wake, but the picture are more or less the same. i just want to share it with you...

i have been away from home for more than 4 years. january 2009 my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 bone cancer. his doctors said he had 2 months to live.only my brother (and his family) in canada, my neice in north caroline and i (and my family) are far from home, we immediately flew to the philippines to be with my dad. we stayed there for a month, we couldn't stay longer. but when i left i promised my dad me and my family would be going back july. so i went back to paris, my neice to north carolina and my brother to canada.

march, april and may passed..it was a miracle that my dad was feeling ok again!! he wasn't taking any pain killers for the cancer. he was fishing, driving around, walking in our neighborhood like he wasn't sick at all. but came june, he caught pneumonia. the doctor warned us about that. i was schedule to come home july 6. the whole of june, i try to contact my dad (thru skype) almost every other day. i wanted him to wait for me....

God is kind. my dad was still alive when we got there. my dad even waited for my husband. and it seemed like everything was already planned...my dad passed away when we were all there, when we still had time to put him to his final resting place and enough time to be with my mom during that grieving time. it was like perfect timing...though i know there is nothing perfect about losing someone.
and just looking at all those photos again makes me miss my dad so much. i am not that sad anymore even if he is gone. but i feel that emptiness that no one else can fill. i just hope that we were able to show that how important he was to us, and that we truly love him.

for my final note, i just want to share this with you... during that last night (july 20) when my dad was in high spirits, he looked at me and told me, 'ikaw si girlie, ano?' (you are girlie, right?) and i answered, 'opo' (yes, dad). then he said, 'ang bait mo...' (you are kind). he said that to me at least twice...and it was his last word to me.

WEEK 31: july 31...

31 july: our next project was shirts for dad's funeral. me and jake decided to make shirts with uniform print for everyone. i made the design...and my nephews and nieces, with michelle did all the ironing on the shirt! you can see in this picture: miggs, jake - the head of this project!!, aej, aerene, michelle and rafael.


here is my design for me and my siblings...you can see all the couples name are at the bottom and the couple who will wear it have their names highlighted.


and for the grandkis...all their names are written on the border of the design, and the one who wears it has his/her name highlighted too!


the heart is from weeds and wildflower kit.

WEEK 31:j uly 27-29....

27 july: we left antipolo early monday morning and dropped by the house of my sister. since it was almost lunch time when we got there, we decided to treat the kids for pizza. you can see 2 extra large pizzas for all of us!! but just before lunch nitz played basketball with my 2 'grown-up' nephews!! it was the first time they got to play ball. then after lunch, the kids had a wonderful bath in my sisters big tub. we really had fun that day!


left my sister's house a little past 3pm. since it was a monday, we thought at that time that our travel would be traffice-free. but you could not imagine we got stuck at south superhighway for 8 hours!!! it took us almost 12 hours to get to batangas when usually you can take it for 2 hours.

28 july:it was almost 4am when we got to batangas. my mom was still awake watching over my dad. i was surprised to see my dad lying down, his breathing has long intervals. he wasn’t looking good. i didn’t know the situation was bad...i guess they didn’t want to alarm me while we were in manila. i had to put the kids to bed, we were all very tired from the 12 hour trip. at around 6am, michelle woke me up to tell me dad was almost gone. i immediately woke up, went to my dad. i still caught him with a little heartbeat...til everything stopped. there it was, my dad was gone. i was in shock!! somewhere in my mind i knew my dad was gone but i didn't know why the feeling was 'empty'. i just stared at my dad..hoping for....i really didn't know what i was hoping for. my sister with her family arrived right away, then my brother followed. then i felt it...my dad was gone. we cried together.

29 july: second day...the house was different. well of course there was the wake... but i mean dad was gone but not really. ok, i may be confusing you a bit. i apologize. but what i want to say is, it felt peaceful. i didn't feel pain.
more friends and relatives arrived that day and we were very grateful for their presence and support.

here is my layout for the first part of week 31..

WEEK 30: july 23-26...

my layout for the second half of week 30. but you can read more details below...

23 july: we found this parlor that specializes on very young kids!! but i have to tell you the charge well too(!!). anyway, i wanted sofia to get a decent haircut (remember i was the one who cut her hair!!). the hairstylist was really patient, careful and good! after awhile sofia went down the chair and the hairstylist had to do the finishing touches following her around inside the parlor...hehehe.

24 july: i was really happy to see tita beth! she owns the apartment where i bedspaced when i was in college. i could still remember our address there: 943-S Estrada St., Malate, Manila. we exchanged so many stories! i have good memories of my stay in that apartment.

24 july: that evening we had dinner at 'mader's'(mother) house. i call her mader(or mother..her real name is malu) because she has always been like a mother to me. the time when i had my first child, she was there beside me all the way. my mom that time was in the united states. mader is a brilliant cook!! and that night we had to chance to taste it again.

25 july: we had lunch with tita del, tito mike and leobert. how we got close to tita del is a very interesting story. tita del worked for lafarge as a consultant for awhile. that time me and nitz were working in lafarge too, nitz and tita del happened to be in the same department. tita del said that nitz' name rang a bell..and she found out nitz is the nephew of her bestfriend. from then on tita del because like an aunt to us. they got to visit us in paris and that was where we met leobert. so there... the story of our friendship!!

26 july: sunday in antipolo...and it is blackout!! it was raining hard and there was no electricity from 2pm until a little after 10pm. yup!! that is typical in the philippines!!

WEEK 30: july 20-22...

july 20...that evening i was busy packing all our stuff because we were going to manila the following day. nitz was arriving from paris. we planned to stay in manila for a couple of days because we needed to (1) renew our passports, (2) submit/finalize the documents needed for our canada immigration application and (3) spend time with my in-laws.
it was almost midnight when my dad came out of his bedroom and asked me to take some pictures of him. it was the very first time that i saw him smile!! he was full of energy and really happy!! he wore a nice polo shirt and i started taking photos of him with the kids and with my mom. that time i was playing some music, it was the cd of westlife... i was surprised that my dad started dancing!!! i ran for my video and recorded it!! then he requested if we could play a tango tune so he and mom could dance. and they did dance... tango then cha-cha!! and before he went to bed, he picked-up and carried isabelle.it was really one amazing night!! i had been there since july 9 but that night was the very first night that my dad was really happy.

LAYOUT: week 29.. july 13-19

somehow i am lost... i really don't know how to post all the days that i was missing. so finally i decided i will just post my weekly layouts and add some more photos that i want to share with you.
to start...here is my week 29 layout. it covers july 13-16, it is the first part of the week. after each layout i will add more photos that i want to share. but in this case (meaning for this layout) i think i was still able to post more details...(you can scroll down if you want to see more about the first part of week 29.

here is the second part of week 29, covers july 17-19.

and here you can see my dad... as always he was really too weak and couldn't take part in all the fuzz. he was just standing at the side...but i knew he enjoyed seeing all his grandkids in the house.

it was indeed a wonderful birthday celebration for sofia. thank you jake for that wondeful and delicious cake!!! and to our special guest, the OLAN family.. thank you for coming to sofia's birthday!

LAYOUT: week 28... july 6-12

sharing with you my week 28 layouts!!